The 'Perfect' Lie

How do you feel about your body? Do you love it, care for it, check it out in the mirror and think “F#ck Yeah, I look gooood”?  

No? Why not? Stomach to big? To much cellulite? To pale? Hey, me too! The fact is, we are never going to look 'perfect'. Unless you have thousands of dollars to buy it, perfect does not exist. It is a false concept. A lie. A lie told to you to sell you more stuff. 

Think about that.

Oh, and even if you do have the money for plastic surgery, do you really want to pay some one to cut open your beautiful body so that you can conform to society's, or you own, ideas of physical perfection? How loving is that?

We only have one body, and that body is going to be with us through everything. It is what gets us through from the day of our birth, until the day that we die. How we treat it decides how we feel on a day to day basis, and displays how much we respect and value ourselves.

So I want you to try an exercise with me. I want you to repeat this to yourself-

'I'm too fat. I need to lose weight because my thighs are disgusting'.

Really let that thought soak in. How does it make you feel? Good? Rockin' the self-love? No?

The way we talk about ourselves, and the way we talk about our bodies, has an enormous impact on our self-confidence and self-respect. Maybe you don't quite know it yet, maybe you do but are still getting the hang of it, but I can promise you that you deserve so much better than that. So much better than to be put down because of your body shape, to be considered in any way less than an amazing person because you aren't 6ft tall, big breasted, small breasted, a size 8 or whatever.

Your body shape has Nothing to do with Your Self Worth. Not a thing.

It is a very strange world, when we consider that a woman's body is used as a tool to judge that entire person, no? Completely disregarding the incredible brain power that woman has, her compassionate nature, her quirky creativity...you get the point. You are SO much more than that, and to suggest anything less is down-right disrespectful.

So now lets try one more exercise. Repeat after me-

'I have a beautiful body. It is amazing, strong, and I love it'.

Now how does that one feel? Hopefully your answer is 'Much better'! Your body is an amazing thing. It can move and bend, be powerful or nurturing, give you health and vitality, mental clarity, help you feel good in the sun or in the bath, it can give you orgasms and will take care of you from day 1 until day 99, or however old you live to.

So for this week, I want you to listen to the way you speak about your body and pay attention to the feelings that arise when you regard your body. Are they serving you well? Are they honoring you as the beautiful woman you are? Spend some time with your body this week. Just the two of you. Get to know it. Tune into it and ask it how it feels. I do mean this literally. Just focusing on it and asking it can help you become aware of what it needs. Maybe it will reply it needs more water, more sleep, more laughter, more attention. Really, this works.

Take some time out in the bath, the shower, the spa. Take a yoga class and use your body. Skip, run, dance, walk, eat fruit salad, ask your body what it wants for dinner, lift weights, swim, do something that gets your body and your mind grooving together! Accept your body. Love your body.

When you accept your body and take care of it as an act of self-caring, instead of an act of self-loathing (Eating well because you feel to fat, as opposed to eating well because you deserve to feel and look your best) you are treating yourself with utmost respect and love. What could be better?

So that is your assignment for the week. If it feels weird or unnatural, think back to the 'Fake it till you Make it' concept, and eventually it will feel more comfortable. Be a model of self-caring and love for all the other women and girls in your life.

Rebel. Love yourself. All of yourself. What could be more beautiful than that?

Yours in Self-Love,

JessieAnne XO

Letting go of my addictions.

So, humans are addictive animals. We love when we can repeat something over and over and know it will give us joy. Some drink, some smoke, some..i dunno...eat cabbage?

Some shop. Many shop. I know I do. I can get a rush of the new over cotton buds. What the?
I have had a budget for a while, and I can never stick to it. No matter how much I get. If I get thirty, I want sixty. If I get eighty, then I want a hundred. I don't quite know why I love shopping so much, It just always feel like my life will be more complete/organised/beautiful/fashionable if I own that shoe, eyeliner..you name it.

So, recently ive been getting stressed about my addiction. I'm planning to move out soon, and I really need to try and kick (or even just lower) my spending so that I can eat. When I noticed that Gala Darling (yes-i'm a tad obsessed but she's so darn helpful) was going to go on a shopping detox for the month of January, I decided to boldly give it a try..for extra motivation i've promised myself that if I can do it, ill buy the shoes she designed that are hot pink leopard print...so fabulous.

Check out her post on this topic!http://galadarling.com/article/resolutions-for-january-the-shopping-detox-experiment

So what this means is that I can't buy:
-Shoes-unless for work or a special event.
-Clothes-unless they're neccesary like undergarments or something that my wardrobe is lacking, ie a cardigan.
-Makeup- unless it's foundation or mascara..essentials that I need to wear to job interviews basically.
-Jewellery, hats, accessories, bags you get my drift

Heck, It's even marketed as cool and fun to be addicted...seriously???


I really want to see what it feels like to know that I really can't just buy what I want, and that i'm really committed. I also hope that it will give me a chance to properly go through my wardrobe and see what I can wear and what I can reuse. I think at times i'm going to feel really frustrated and really angry, and other times I hope to feel empowered and stronger. I can say no to people treating me badly and taking what I can't afford from me (time, energy) so why can't I do the same to shoes? Like many people have said before, I don't want to be like Carrie Bradshaw, and have a down payment on a house's worth of shoes. Having said that, my shoe collection probably comes up to reasonable 1,500 probably. And that's over 4 years, since i don't wear heels often. So, roughly 300 dollars per year.

Anyways, I plan to document my thoughts and feelings on here. However, since it won't all warrant a post of it's own, i'll be more likely to tweet what i'm going through. Want to know how scary kicking shopping can be? follow me on twitter as http://twitter.com/#!/prettycannibal

I'll follow people back, too!

And please, let me know what you think of this or if you decide to detox too.

Much love and sparkles,

Britt. xo

TiLT my world!!!!

So, I am writing this in a sleep lacking haze. It's 3.09 am, and Ive been trying to sleep for hours. Between worrying about a 13 year best-friendship possibly ending and just random crap that happened today, I'm feeling really low. So before my sleeping pill kicks in (which I ONLY recommend doing when youre desperate) I thought that I should spend a few minutes reminding me why my life doesn't suck, and why, it's actually getting better. Sorry, that intro was rather heavy, but we all have times like this, and I think creating a TiLT is a great way to help yourself out of it!

image found on google.


1. People are back at work. What this means is that suddenly, a million and one companies are looking for staff, and since I am currently not working, I can apply for 13 jobs per day and be hired in a month. That's my goal.

2. This necklace:

Which Gala Darling was wearing in a recent post, which I went and bought and is being custom made. I did ask for a few different details though, in order to make mine unique. I also bought a plain, silver glittery one, and I plan for these to be my totems during February and all the time for Radical Self Love month.

3. Having my next tattoos just appear to me during some quiet time. I've been thinking of how to honour and remember my cat who passed on in 2010 and I'd had since I was two years old. She lived to be 18 and meant everything to me. Initially, I was going to get her gorgeous picture tattooed on my arm, but after much consideration I decided i didn't want such a big tattoo. And tonight I realised that her name "frosty" would look perfect on my ankle, beneath a current tattoo. The second one, which im not yet certain about is a little pink heart with a blue ring around it on my shoulder on my front side, thats only two centimetres big to remind me to have self confidence, to love myself and others and to seek only the path of love and joy and happiness and kindness. Sounds a little cheesy, but really, who doesn't want to leave a positive impact on the world.

4. Spending all my time playing World of Warcraft. yes, im a nerd. Shock horror. haha. many a time, ill curl up on the bed while my boyfriend plays WoW on his desktop, and on his second screen, an anime will be running. We love the subbed "One Piece" subbed means that the anime is exactly the same as what was released in Japan, so they all speak Jap, but we can read what they're saying in English.

5. Getting healthier. By this, I do not yet mean exercising frequently and such, and although I plan to get to that, all I currently mean is getting rid of snacking and reducing my portions back to pre christmas sizes. The one hard thing about Christmas for me is there seems to be food at every corner during this time of year.

6.Finally figuring out whats happening with an important friendship. I have been best friends with someone for many years (since primary school) but in the last two years weve grown apart. On my side, I feel like they've changed and that they are becoming someone who I don't neccesarily enjoy seeing, for them? I don't know. But basically, we're having a convo soon that has been a long time coming. I hope it goes well, as their friendship means alot to me, and I really want to repair it. It is at least good to know that I will soon have an outcome.

Little things that made me smile!
-Being complemented on finally wearing some colour. -Painting my bedroom wall a nice minty blue. -My boyfriend and my family. -Driving lessons in the car ill be using when i'm a P plater. -Eating less choccy.


Ok, I could go on, but Im finally feeling tired now. At least I feel so much happierm and more gratefull.

Thank-you so much for reading,
Much love and joy,

Britt!

My 2001 Vision!

Hey All.
So, 2011 huh? If I have my way, by the end of it, Ill have moved out, lost twenty kilos and be living an even more awesome life. If I have to work hard to get my way, then so be it.


But that's not actually what I want to talk about. I want to talk about the things that are shaping my vision of 2011, and the things that i can already see will help me create the year I want. Including the wardrobe I want.
So here it is, my list of 2011 influences.

                                                                  GALA DARLING

The first, and probably most major one, as some of you will know from twitter, is Gala Darling. I've raved about her before, but I just can't seem to stop it! So, you need to head to her blog, www.galadarling.com. What will you find? Not only will you find a chic and oh-so-fantastic New Yorker with an epic fashion sense (Bright pink and glitter...sparkles...oh she makes me swoon.) you will also find advice on how to create a fantastic future. Need to de-goth your wardrobe? Her first ever post, fashion help for recovering goths has you covered. Need to increase self-esteem? easy done. Check out anything on radical self love. Plus, she has an EPIC taste in shoes!

                                                              LOVE AND SEQUINS

On that note, Ill go on to Gala Darlings' "Love and Sequins" a 12 part podcast series, on topics such as her own guide to New York (which made me fall in love with it instantly) Travel tips, Love, Relationships and cutlivating Happiness. They're not super cheap, but oh my god, they are worth it!! You'll thank me for raving!


                                                              DITA VON TEESE

For Christmas, one of my presents was Dita Von Teese's book, "Burlesque and the art of the teese" and I have fallen in love. I have always loved pin up and retro looks, and when I dream of having an office job, the only great part I see is wearing vintage inspired outfits and red lips everyday. So glamorous, yet work safe.Oh, and I'd also continue my winged eyeliner, as I love so much.So, this book runs through the history of Burlesque, and is a very interesting read. However, the most incredible part is the fashion and images. If you ever see this book, you must at least flick through it! This book also has a naughty little secret. Flip it over to read "Fetish and the art of the teese" even if fetish doesn't interest you, it's still interesting to see it's origins and learn a bit more about this whole other world!

I will be incorporating a bit of Dita into my wardrobe by buying some more curve accentuating pieces, and doing my take on a modern/retro nail. As you will see here, my nails are painted pink, yet the moon section is blank, as was common back then! its simple too. Just use those french nail tip stickers to cover the moon part and paint over it!

                                                                   DOE DEERE.

 

As much as I don't care for her company's products, (Miss Deere owns LimeCrime, a makeup company that has been scandalised) you've still got to admit, she has great vision. She has created a vision called "Candyfuturism" and it's basically bright, sparkling colours, with tutus and gems and innocence. She is kind of like Katy Perry, but more awesome. Check her out at www.doedeereblogazine.com Ive definetely fallen in love with pink and teal worn together. Head over heels here.

                                                            AMELIA ARSENIC.

So, lately my aesthetic has gotten a little softer and girlier, but I still adore edgier, tougher, more...shiny looks. Enter Amelia of www.destroyx.com. Lead singer of one of my favourite bands, Angelspit (not for the weakhearted though) she also owns her own makeup and accesory line (www.blackpillredpill.com) and one of my favourites is her loose shadow in 'car crash red". It's the only red I use and it's incredible. Amelia herself is a fan of latex, medical themes, anything "fetish" corsets and she's the sweetest little cupcake in real life.


                                                                  POLYVORE.

 www.polyvore.com is my testing grounds for new outfit ideas. I can recreate entire looks, dream up how I would wear that studded jacket whose brand I forget, but I remember Michael Jackson rocking. Just, check it out when you have a few minutes free.

                                                        ~ <3 ~
So, my general direction?
Massive life improvement via goal setting, affirmations, EFT-learn about this from Galas' website.
Losing twenty kilos and settling into a good job and beginning to work on my makeup career. or nfluences.


Wearing more pink and blue, more sparkle, more glitter and also wearing my classic, black. This year is about trying to create a tough yet feminine style that I can really enjoy.
MORE DRESSES!! I've fallen in love with them too.


I am DYING to hear what sets your heart a-flutter! Do tell what's inspiring you!

xx, Brittany.

2011: Your Year to fly Sky-High!

Okay, so we all know the value of goal setting. We've heard it over and over again- Set Goals! If you want to get anywhere, Set Goals!

Well, they are right. Everyone needs a road map to their ultimate life.

What a lot of people forget is that this is your life. No one elses. You set the rules, you decide how to live it. Everything in your life right now is there because at some point you made a choice. Even choosing not to act is a choice.

So why not take the helm and steer your life with full intention and consciousness?

So. How do you make this coming year the best one yet?

Sit down and have a really good think, a heart to heart with yourself about what you want. Don't hold back!

Don't worry about how you'll achieve them at this stage, that comes later. For now, just put them down. It can be anything from the trivial (drink more champagne) to the life-changing (career change anyone?).

So what can you think of? Do you like your job? Is this where you want to be in a years time? Perhaps a career change, or just changing locations to get back time from your commute.

What about relationships? Are the people in your life lifting you up? Maybe you want a bigger circle of friends, or maybe fewer acquaintances and more genuine friendships?

Do you want a monogamous relationship or a new lover every month? Maybe you want to spend a year alone?

At the end of the day, you want to look at where you are now, and where you want to be this time next year. You might be going from strength to strength, or just finding your feet. You can think about things like how you want to dress, what projects you want to volunteer for, what you want to learn..you get the drift!

Once you have your list, you can write it up, type it, draw it or even make a Dream Board, with images from magazines and photos that represent your goals and inspire you. Just make sure you put it somewhere you can see it. Having this constant reminder will help you on a subconscious level, as well as consciously, to stay on track. And don't worry if you change your mind about something, it's totally your prerogative.

Next, you want to figure out a time line and break down of these goals. It will ensure you take the necessary action to make these things happen. Breaking big goals down into baby steps will make it so much easier to tackle, one thing at a time.

For instance, if you're not happy in your job, and know you need to do a course to get where you want to be, have a look at the course schedule. Write it down, then decide when you will start to look for work in your new industry.

Of course, it can get much more detailed than that, or if your goal is a little less tangible, like 'Get healthy', figure out what that means to you. Eg. Join the gym in January, quit drinking for February...

etc.

Basically, each big goal needs a smaller list of stepping-stones to get there, and part of that is making sure things are done by a certain time. This gives you focus and drive.

Just to demonstrate how unlimited your own goals can be, here is a quick sample from my own:

• Study 'Boxing for Fitness'
• Meditate daily
• Finish my book. Research publishing houses.
• Go to a masquerade ball.
• Drink a bottle of champagne in the garden for a week

And I promise, it is a lot longer than that. Next I will break down each goal into a step-by-step process.

So what are you waiting for? Start dreaming big!

The most beautiful Art is the Art of a life well-lived.

Yours in Self-Love and excitement for 2011,

JessieAnne XO

What makes you wear makeup?

First up, Merry Christmas! hope you had a great time, as I did.



Leading up to Christmas, one of the thoughts on my mind was "What makeup should I wear for Christmas Eve?' (My partner's family event is that day, and it is the most formal part of my christmas.)
Should I wear bold eyes? perhaps a bright pink lip? should I do a smokey eye? should I do natural makeup?
I noticed that the only option I didn't consider was no makeup. This struck me as odd, since aside from trying out some makeup I was given as a present, I wore no makeup on Christmas day.
I seemed to have it stuck in my head that any semi formal event meant I had to do makeup.  So, after going with bright blue eyeliner and pink lips..(dont worry, It worked and looked awesome) I felt ready to go to this event. No-one else there was wearing makeup. Or much makeup at least.

And then today during some browsing, my usual haunt, www.galadarling.com had created a list of highlights from her blog over the year, and I noticed this post. http://galadarling.com/article/oh-make-me-overWhich, obviously, was fun for me. But then I noticed her writing about something called "No makeup week" which was created by another blogger, Rabbit Write. Nedless to say, this captured my attention. I also poked around and noticed that Zoetica Ebb had participated and had some interesting stuff to say.

I believe most people wear makeup because they are self conscious of their skin or their face, which in a way, is fair enough. But its not like we want a friend who never wears makeup to cover her skin up so it looks even and 'flawless', yet we feel like we must do that ourselves.
Many of us believe that it's expected in the workplace, and that it makes our jobs easier. I also don't get this one, as I have worn a full face of makeup to work, as well as a bare face with a giant rash on my forehad thanks to an allergic reaction, and I still had a roughly similiar day.

I know why I wear makeup though.
I like the glamour of it, the fun of it, and the idea that I can create a persona through my hair and makeup and clothes that I can emanate through the day, so really, for me, its a sophisticated dress up party every day. Who do I want to be? Retro bombshell a la Dita Von Teese? Modern, candy like pinup, a la Katy Perry? Goth? Faerie child? I can create myself. That is exciting to me.
However, my view can perhaps be bias, as I also like how I look sans makeup. I am fortunate enough to have clear skin. However, it's dry at places, I have horrid undereye circles and I much prefer having at least tinted lip balm and mascara.

Makeup isn't a chore for me, and Ill happily show my bare face. See? ignore the silly face and lame t-shirt...haha.

I really want to know more about what motivates other people, and if you could go a week without makeup.Also, how old were you when you started wearing a full face? I only bought my first foundation this year, at 19 years old. However, ive been wearing eyeshadow and lip colours for years.
What do you think about our perceived need to cover ourselves in a million potions and products, and how does it affect how you view people when you meet them? I know I couldn't go to a job interview without makeup, as it can be a mask for me too.

Please do share, I'm really interested!

How to be Alone...and why everyone should try it!

There is rarely a time when we're not plugged into some sort of media or another. We've got iphones, Facebook, Ipods, TV, email, blogs, live feeds on our phones...you get the picture.

Genuine time alone is becoming a rarity.

But how can we get to know ourselves if we're never alone with ourselves? A lot of people are actually uncomfortable being alone, and will even turn on the TV just to fill the silence. Does this sound at all like you?

When we spend time alone, we give ourselves breathing space and time to tune into what's really going on in our minds and emotions. We have to deal with all the stuff that we may have been squashing down inside ourselves. Rather than this being a scary thing, it's actually a very empowering and healthy thing to do.

When we tune into ourselves and listen to what's really going on mentally and emotionally, we can gauge what's happening in our lives and where we're happy, or which situations we may need to work on to improve. This allows us to make better decisions for our own highest benefit, which in turn allows us to move forward to a better, happier existence. 

However, being alone doesn't have to mean sitting in your bedroom staring at the wall! One fun idea is to have a romance....with yourself! You are the number one person in your life, and you always be, whether single, playing the field or in a committed relationship. So spending quality time alone, and treating yourself like the beautiful person you are, is a great way to get in touch with yourself.

Here are some fun ideas for spending time alone.

• Take yourself out for brunch or lunch. Sit in a window seat and watch the world go by whilst enjoying the most extravagant, yummy dish you can afford.
• Go walking or hiking alone. Find a national park or walking trail and get out there. Enjoy the fresh air and the natural setting, whilst taking time and space to think, and to take in the beautiful scenery. This is an ideal way to recharge those batteries if you're normally a very busy person.
• Work out! Spending time at the gym or taking yourself off to a class is not only giving you time and space away from the world, it's also going to give a an endorphin rush and a healthy body.
• Spend time journalling the old fashioned way- with pen and paper. That way there's no internet to distract you, and you can get those thoughts, ideas and inspirations out on paper.
• Spend time alone playing an instrument. Playing music helps you focus on what you're doing, and helps to switch off the constant chatter in your mind.
• Pamper yourself. Go get a massage. Give yourself a facial, and burn essential oils.
• Take yourself to see a movie. This one can be especially challenging, as the cinema is full of groups of people and couples and it can feel a bit lame sitting there on your own. But this is even more reason to do it! Being comfortable enough with your own presence that you can do what you want, when you want, instead of waiting till other people are ready to join you, is very freeing.
• Meditate! The ultimate way to get in touch with your calm, centered self.
• Grab a sketch book and draw.
• Paint, or go out with a camera and take photos of all the beauty you see around you.
• Sew, or revamp your wardrobe. Get creative, be bold!

After a while, you'll come to truly appreciate how great a person you are to spend time with, and to appreciate the clarity of thought this time can give you.

Remember, it's all about taking care of you, because you know you totally deserve it. :)

'I've been in a relationship with myself for 49 years and that's the one I need to work on. ' - Samantha Jones, Sex and the City 2.

Yours in Self-Love,

JessieAnne.